Thursday, June 15, 2006

Thursday Thirteen!!!!!

Thirteen things I learned from my dogs

1. Dead things really, really smell bad. Especially if they've been dead for over a week, and it's hot out, and your dog rolls in it and then lies down on the sofa.

2. Sofas never really let go of bad odors.

3. Rugs look strange when the fringe gets chewed off.

4. Leashes and collars should be made from chains, otherwise they can be bitten through in about two minutes flat.

5. Three a.m. is a bad time to wake up the neighbors with hysterical barking. They are sure to mention it next time you meet.

6. Small holes near the fence should be filled in right away, or else dogs can dig their way out and find their way to the neighbor's house and remind him why he never got a dog.

7. Toilet training takes longer than you think. Dog piss does wash out of socks and slippers, but it's best not to step in it in the first place...

8. Barbie dolls look terrible with chewed up heads.

9. Leaving something on the floor is only an option if you want to find only half of it the next day.

10. A determined dog can dig up a tiled floor. (this one didn't happen to me, but I saw the result. Oh boy.)

11. A Labrador retriever can chew up and swallow an entire large size tupperware bowl and its lid, but some pieces can get stuck in the digestive system resulting in a vet bill that would have paid a month's rent.

12. A large dog, tied to a cement block, is a bad idea on a brand new lawn.

13. No matter how mad you are and how angry you get, your dog always forgives you.


Doug Hoffman said...

Woof! What a list.

I still can't get over the difference between the photos on your main entry page and your blog. Like two different people, Sam.

Sam said...

What main entry page?
You mean my Samantha Winston site?
Those were taken a LONG time ago - waybackwhen.
This one was taken last summer.

Pat J said...

Sounds like quite the dog you've got yourself there.

I've got an entry in the 13s up too.

Found your list via Doug's list.

Corn Dog said...

14. Dogs are quicker than humans especially if chicken accidentally hitting the kitchen floor is involved. If this happens, consider the dog turbo-ized and stand back for your own safety.

15. Dogs will take care of security at the house. Of course all of the following rank the same - a cat, the mailman, a burglar and scary flies.

16. Dogs have location preference in the bed. Understand that rule and no one gets hurt. The little dog will poke you in the belly fat in the middle of the night if she requires more room than she originally thought.

Wynn Bexton said...

Funny dog stuff and oh, so true!
I can't keep doggies now but I have a very entertaining (and sometimes naughty) cockatiel so I can provide some bird behavior stories.
Actually I was so pleased with how he's 'reformed' since his weekend with the bird handler people that she emailed today to ask if she could put my quotes and a pix of me and Cheeky boy in the exotic bird newsletter. Of course I said yes. Now birdie boy and I are famous!

Lucy said...

sounds like you need a session with the "dog whisperer" Cesar Milan -- I am reading his new book, really good...