Saturday, August 05, 2006

Igor the Giant Suitcase

This is a silly post, I warn you ahead of time. Fact is, I do most of my shopping at the Thrift store in the US. (I didn't get to go this year so I didn't get to change my entire wardrobe and will have to continue wearing my last-year's Thrift offering...luckily it includes a soft gray sweater that goes with anything.)

Last year I went several times to the Thrift and bought far more than one suitcase could hold. So, I went back to the Thrift and found another suitcase. Choices at the Thrift, as you know, are limited. There were two - one was a very small toilet bag and the other was a HUGE suitcase on wheels. It was the size of an oil barrel, square, and was made of a sort of 'faux taspestry' material in green, magenta, and black. Hideous is the word that comes to mind, but at the time I was only thinking 'Lots of Space' and plunked down seven dollars for the suitcase. I wheeled it outside to the car and got my first shock. It BARELY fit into the trunk. I looked closer at the monster. It was a lot bigger than I'd thought. I got in the car, and my mother and daughter looked at me and said, "Why did you get such a huge suitcase? It's monstrous!"
I leaned back in my seat and shrugged. "I'll call it Igor," I said.
"Igor?" My daughter giggled, but the name stuck.
We drove around to the grocery store and bought our groceries - and we couldn't put them in the trunk because of Igor. We put them in the backseat - and I started to have doubts about Igor. I imagined myself pulling him through the airport - he was nearly as tall as my ten year old daughter. He would weight three tons. He had wheels, but they were wobbly. And once full of clothes - he would weigh...three tons. Three tons. The words were a death knell for Igor. I turned to my mother and said, "We have to take Igor back to the store. He's too big."
My mother bit her lip then said, "you mean, he doesn't fit in with the family?"
My daughter howled with laughter at that one.
"No, he just doesn't fit in." I was giggling too at this point. "But I'll miss him."
"We will all miss Igor," my daughter said.
"Actually, he's hard to miss," my mother said.
Visions of me dragging the monster along the hallway, crowding people to the side, squashing anyone in their way assailed me. Yes, Igor had to go.
We dropped him off at the Thrift. They gave me a gift certificate for seven dollars. We went to another store and bought a normal-sized red duffle bag with two small wheels at one end and a big 'W' on the side.
We called this one Mr. Wilson. On his first trip he got a rip in the wheelie end and now sports a large patch of silver duct tape.
He's still with us. It makes people turn and stare at the baggage claim when he pops out of the chute and my daughter yells "There goes Mr. Wilson with the tape on his butt! Get him quick!"

But we still think of Igor now and then...


Wynn Bexton said...

Funny! I just bought a sweet little mauve number for my trip to NYC and Chile. I haven't got a name for 'her' as yet.

Michelle B said...

LOL! Great story:) I, too, would wonder if I heard your daughter shouting about Mr. Wilson with tape on his butt. If I ever hear that at an airport, I'll know you are near LOL!

Bonita said...

Ach, the perils of needing more packing space when traveling! LOL

Jona said...

I did that when I was backpacking - big mistake to have a huge bag! Though at least were sensible and realised before using it ;o)

Erin the Innocent said...

LMAO!!! Someone should have bought Igor for you for Christmas and sent it to you *g*

Too funny *snort*

Doug Hoffman said...

I like using duffel bags -- they collapse, can be packed into your other suitcase, and they hold tons of stuff for the trip back.

Great punchline, Sam :)

Gabriele C. said...

When I arrived at Edingburgh Airport I noticed my suitcase had a nasty rip, went to the Air France terminal and showed them. They gave me the address of a shop and a certificate that Air France would pay for a new suitcase. The shop was even close to my B&B, so I unpacked the ripped suitcase and took it and the certificate to the shop. They had lots of suitcases but since I needed one with wheels they were either too small or really big. I got one of the really big ones that cost thrice of what the ripped one had cost (both were Samsonite) but the owner said it was ok, Air France would pay him.

Then I had to drag that really big suitcase with rather tiny wheels all through Scotland. It's the biggest suitcase in my collection, a monster you only need for a journey around the world or if you have to pack three big fluffy winter coats and a pair of skiing boots. I have three fluffy winter coats but no skiing boots, so what am I to do?