Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Garden day

Yesterday, I took the clippers out and started to trip the forsythia bush in the front lawn. It had gotten so big it was taking over the small space. My husband ended up cutting it ALL back, now there is just a stump. It will grow back, never fear - and it will be a nice, tame bush for a couple years.
But I ended up weeding, raking, planting and trimming. I itched all night with bug bites and nettle stings. Here is a picture of the space where the tree was, and the stump with a boar's skull on it (very Lord of the Flies). (Or redneck - whatever.)


But after the flowers I planted grow, this will be a mass of bright colors (I made sure to add marigolds to the seed mix - if nothing else grows, they will, lol.)

Then today, I started to mow the lawn in the back, and since I can't start something and not finish, I finished the whole lawn, then weedwhacked, trimmed, weeded, and cut the nettles under the fig tree. Now I am again covered with nettle rash and bug bites, and looking forward to another night tossing and turning...and itching. But doesn't the garden look nice?


Monday, May 21, 2007

Flying

I took my son to the airport yesterday. He was supposed to be leaving with Tony - who lives next to us and who wanted to go to the US this summer. But Tony's passport was expired, so we ended up trying to figure out how soon he would be able to get a new passport, how to change his ticket, and all those fun things you do when a wrench gets thrown into the machine.
Passport - The US only accepts machine readable passports now, so Tony needs to get a new passport. It takes two weeks.
Plane Ticket - He has to pay a 100 euro penalty in order to change the date. I hope he can get a flexible date, because the passport can take longer than 2 weeks.
My daughter and I are going to the states on June 22, and I checked our passports. They are fine.
I missed my plane once. (overslept)
Twice I arrived very, very late, and the plane was held up while I dashed to the gate.
Once the plane was already on the runway, and they stopped it and let me get on. (At a small airport)
Once the radio wasn't working and everyone had to get off and get on a new plane.
Once the brakes didn't work, and we had to wait in the airport while they got fixed - and they we watched as they took off and landed our plane three times in a row.
Once we had an emergency landing. We ditched the fuel, turned around to land back at the ariport we'd just left, and there were eight fire trucks driving along the runway as we landed.
Once we had a bomb scare and everyone was taken off the plane by policemen with machine guns and dogs, and we stood on the tarmac a distance from the plane while the police emptied the baggage and the dogs sniffed everything.
Once I was in a brand new plane. It was for a short flight from Paris to London. I was reading a newspaper, and it said that the plane I was in had been taken off the long distance lines because it did unexpected barrel rolls. I asked the stewardess if that was true, and she said "Yes, so don't unfasten your seatbelt."
Ha ha.
Once I met a man in the plane, and somehow he found out it was my birthday. (I think it was when I was filling out the custom's form with my passport.) He asked the stewardess to get me a peice of cake with a candle and a glass of champagne while I slept. When I woke up, she brought it to me. I was really touched.
The man was from Brazil. I didn't speak Portugese and he ddin't speak English. We had some trouble communicating, but this is what I found out. He was coming to Paris because his son had been killed in an accident. His son had been working on a construction site in Paris. I knew a Brazilian woman who lived in Paris, so I called her when I got to the airport and I took a taxi with the man to her house. She took care of him during the time he was in Paris. She took him to the Brazilian embassy and helped him get everything organized. She made sure he was never alone. Before he left, we had dinner together and he gave me a good luck charm.
I still have it.

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Goodbye Miss Snark!

It looks like an icon will be hanging up her stilettos. Miss Snark has announced she's stopping her blog.
Aspiring writers everywhere will miss her wry comments, Snarkisms, Snarklings, and Killer Yapp. (And George Clooney. Whatever else you can say about Miss Snark - she has good taste in men!)
I'll miss the cocking of the clue gun, but I suppose that if you go through the archives, she's probably answered every question there is about finding an agent. She will leave the blog up, so the archives will be available (thank you, Miss Snark!)
I like the fact that she managed to remain anonymous in the small workd of publishing. (How did she manage that?) I think she might have had secret agent training...
And I loved the contests (so many talented people read her blog) and I found new friends in the comment section (waving to Bernita, Orion, and many, many more.)
I will miss checking on the 'nitwit of the day', and hearing about Killer Yapp.
I can't imagine anyone taking her place!
Goodbye Miss Snark!

The social butterfly

The social butterfly flutters from party to party, wings flashing, bright colors alluring, but insubstantial and ultimately short lived.
I can understand the short lived part. After three days with three dinners, two lunches, a play, and a party, I'm feeling decidedly run down. The butterfly's colors have faded, she can hardly move her wings. And I drank a bit too much wine last night, so this butterfly is looking for some Alka Seltzer as well.
I'm not a social butterfly by nature. But I do have fun at parties and I love having friends over for lunch and dinner. I really do love stopping in for a cup of tea and chatting with my neighbors. But it takes a lot out of me. Last night was lovely. I met interesting people at a famous writer's house (Jeanne Champion) and listened while Ms. Champion read passages from her latest book She gave me a copy, so my TBR pile has just grown another inch.
Yesterday afternoon I had a wonderful 'girls' lunch with Andrea, Corinne, and Anne Marie. I made crab quiche and salad, and Corinne bought her famous cheesecake. And before that, I had a dinner in Paris, a party in a nearby village, a family lunch, and my daughter was in a play!
Tomorrow I'm taking my son to the airport. His visit is already over. It was a whirlwind of lunches and dinners, and already it seems like a dream. I wanted to sit down and talk to him, and hardly got time to do that. I suppose today we'll have some time. (I hope). Social butterflies must make terrible mothers.
I am going to take my wings off, fold them, and put them away.
And find some Alka Selter.

Thursday, May 17, 2007

Thinking Blog!


My blog was chosen by Rosie as a thinking blog!

(Sung to the tune of 'Mine eyes have seen the Glory...')


My blog has had the honor of being chosen by Rosie

It's now officially official that my blog is thinkerly

I'm thrilled amazed delighted and quite pleased she thought of me,

Truth is I'm not that smart!

;-)

The participation rules are simple:
1. If, and only if, you get tagged, write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think,
2. Link to this post so that people can easily find the exact origin of the meme,
3. Optional: Proudly display the 'Thinking Blogger Award' with a link to the post that you wrote. Here is an alternative silver version if gold doesn't fit your blog.
(Optional, what do you mean, optional?)

So here are my five blogs:

Chez Flo (chroniqeuses sans tabou!) A very interesting blog by my friend Flo, who loves to chat about politics, movies, and things happening in France and the rest of the world. (plus it's in French, so it really makes me think as I have to read slower and translate it, lol)
Kate R (I think we were twins separated at birth, but that's not why I picked her.) She's just cool and always has something interesting to say.)
Doug - if Doug doesn't make you think, (and laugh) then nobody can. :-)

Rhian has such a cool life and meets such cool people, that I wish I could switch places with her for a couple days (weeks, years, lol!)
John Nez - artist, illustrator, and all around nice guy.
And I could easily go on and on, and post all the blogs I have linked on my side, because they all make me think, laugh, and wish they were my neighbors so I could drop by for a cup of tea and a long chat.

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

The tortured hero

Bernita's got a blog post about the tortured hero. (and also about the 'Big Secret' often used in the heroine's past, which often, as Bernita so succintly puts it, turns out to be bathos.
(Love that word, lol.)
December chimed in saying she loved the tortured hero, and I have to admit, that to a certain extent, so do I. (Heathcliff, anyone?) However, there are tortures and tortures, and Bernita is right when she says she'd like to see more heros with a problem past who turned out to be perfectly normal. Hallelujah! I have been thinking the same thing.

I was thinking that because my daughter is in seventh grade. (12) Age of rampant hormones and trying to learn all about algebra and human relations at once. Suddenly words like prostitute are heard at the dinner table, as questions come from left field. What is the difference between a prostute and a whore and a bitch? my daughter wanted to know today at lunch. Turns out several boys in her class have started calling all the girls whores. My first reaction is anger - who called my daughter a whore? I will knock his new teeth out. Then I realize the kid is 12, like my daughter, and probably is having the same sort of identity crisis and vocabulary crisis to go along with it. And all these kids come home with tragic looks on their faces. "Mom, so and so did (said) this to me!" And it's a Drama each evening, and each day they start anew. High drama in the junior high. I admire the teachers who have to navigate the teens through this difficult period.
And the drama often reminds me of the tortured heros and neurotic heroines I sometimes come across in books. The hero who can't stop insulting women. The heroine for whom every set back means a torrent of tears. I think it's because romance heros and heroines tend to be young.
Sometimes, as with my daughter, I wish they would grow up though.
:-)

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Happy Birthday, Husband!

Stef in 1980, in Holland.
Yes, it's my husband's birthday. He's one year older, one year better (as I like to think) and one year younger (as Andrea's brother Pablo says. Smooches to Pablo!
We met at the polo club. I watched him play the first weekend, but didn't get to meet him. He broke his arm the next week, and so I got talk to him. Well, sort of talk. My French was limited to 'left, right, and fall down'. His English was what he'd picked up in highschool. (Actually not so bad. And we didn't fight for YEARS - I'd start shouting in English, and he'd look at me and say, Doing de doing de doing." His imitation of a mad American. )
My sister was visiting me, so she was out chaperon for about a month. Stef told me later he tried everything to ditch the sister - but nothing worked, lol. Finally, in desperation, he asked me to visit him in Deauville where he was playing polo. He got his cousin Florence to drive me. I brought my friend with me (Andie MacDowell), and we spent three weeks in Deauville, in freezing cold weather. August in Deauville, and we didn't take off our jackets!

We've been together since 1979, and I'm still crazy about my guy.
Happy Birthday Stef!

Andie, Stef, and me at the polo field in Deauville. It was cold that month!



Stef and me in Florida in 1980.

Stef with our daughter at the cross country course this year.

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Fish out of Water

I got an e-mail the other day from a girl I knew in junior high school. We were in the same class for a couple years when we lived in St. Thomas. We were good friends for the short time we knew each other. Her house was so incredible it left a lasting impression on me. I used it for a setting in one of my short stories - The Devil in Me. I mentioned this when I wrote back to her, and she asked to read the story, so I sent her the link.
She sent me back a letter saying, " I miss that island understanding. I still feel like a fish out of water here in the States. Though the last time I went to St. Thomas ('98 for 4 weeks on vacation) it didn't feel like home anymore either. "

It got me thinking. I always feel like a fish out of water, no matter where I am. I never felt like I belonged in St. Thomas (or I'd still be there) or in the States, or even in Europe. I love it here, and I am perfectly happy no matter where I am (Village Idiots 'R Us) but I definitely feel like a fish out of water. I'm happy, and I feel content to be wherever I am, but no matter where I am, I have the impression that I'm a blue guppy in a bowl of goldfish.

I was about to write back to her that I was sure Everyone felt that way. But I'm suddenly not so sure. My neighbor brought my dogs back this morning (they got out of the garden and happily accompanied him on his rounds at the farm. He let them follow him, then brought them back. Auguste and Rusty were thrilled. A walk! A new friend!) I asked him if he ever thought of living anywhere else but here, and he looked at me like I was a...fish flopping on the bank of a pond, and shook his head. "Nope."

So maybe my friend and I are the only ones who feel that we are fish out of water, no matter where we are. What about you? Do you sometimes feel like you're a fish out of water? Or are you, like my neighbor, comfortable in your environment?


Saturday, May 12, 2007

Allergies again

It must have been from working in the garden. I was Overcome by my allergies. I had an earache, a stuffed head, my eyes stung, I kept sneezing, I was miserable.
The funny thing is, I don't remember having allergies as a kid. Then again, I was always sick with a sore throat or earache, and according to my doctor here, it could have been allergies. When I lived in St. Thomas, there wasn't the same sort of pollen, so I never noticed. The worst was when I was in Argentina one spring. I had terrible allergies and spent most nights chugging down cough medicine, thinking it was bronchitis.
Now I know what it is, (I have the most common of allergies - grass pollen and tree pollen.) and I have my miracle pills. They take away the sneezing, the earache, the sore throat, the runny eyes and nose. Amazing. They also make me feel as if I should be sleeping, or if I AM sleeping, and all this is a slightly fuzzy dream.
I am wondering if I can get any work done today. Yesterday I had to drive my daughter around, and I was terrified I'd fall asleep at the wheel. I fell asleep at nine last night, and dragged myself out of bed at ten this morning (it's a weekend, I can do this, lol.) But I feel like I'm underwater. My head is both clear and yet fuzzy. The allergy pills are probably too strong and I should get some....*snore* ...............
..........*huh?* Oh, where was I?
Yes, new allergy medicine.
That's how I feel. I can keep an idea in my head for about two minutes. It's very frustrating.
And I keep yawning.
OK - time for some More Coffee (Have you sever seen anyone with coffee tremors who kept falling asleep?)

I also got a request for a full from my query and sent off the wrong manuscript. (not entirely wrong - I sent off an earlier version when I had the corrected and perfect version ready. This will teach me to keep all my versions in the same folder.) I debated about writing back to the agent and explaining, and then thought, what the hell, it's only a slightly less perfect version. And then my mind skipped to other things.
I'm beginning to think that these pills aren't so bad after all. They don't let me worry.
I can't concentrate enough to worry.
Anyhow, if the agent I sent the full to is reading this blog, please be advised that there is a slightly better version available, where for example, I got rid of that silly typo in the second chapter that made my hero's dog glow instead of growl.


Update:
My mother reads my blog. She called me from the US to tell me I've misplaced another modifier.
Hat's off to whoever spots it!
I won't correct it. Yes it makes me look like a ditz - but it's funny.

Thursday, May 10, 2007

My garden is stunning

Well, my husband and I have been working in the garden for two days now. My nails are ruined, my hands tingle from nettle rash, I have black spots on my pants from the lawnmower, and grease from cleaning the barbecue (I know, who cleans a barbecue? All I could think of as I scrubbed was, 'Andrea will be so proud of me!' Aren't you Andrea? hee hee!)

I ripped out weeds and transplanted plants, replanted plants, weeded some more, tore up miles of ivy, chopped ivy stems (Die plant, DIE!!) and mowed and weedwhacked and did all that great stuff that exhausts you - especially since you know that in about a week you have to start All Over Again.
Why does grass have to grow? I was thinking seriously about green cement today.
How nice.


On the left is a bare wall. It was like the wall facing it - covered with ivy. We removed it. Now we have to do the other side. Ivy is pretty, but it has a bad habit of not knowing when to stop. If we let it, it will take over the world. There is a rabbit hutch under the ivy just behind my flower bed. It's a little brick hut, and very cute, but you can't see it any more.

And what happens when you finish working on the garden? You go inside, lol. Well, it was getting very hot and buggy and the grass and nettles were in our clothes and itching. So we didn't hang out in the garden going 'ohhhh!'

We do, however. Here are some pictures of my sister, my daughter, and I hanging out in the garden on a summer night.




Oh wait, that's Versailles!


Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Tag! You're it!

Erin tagged me!
Da Rulez:
1.Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.2. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.3. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.4. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

Eight things about 'Moi'!

1. I'm a Leo - that says it all.

2. I'm also the Chinese sign of the Rat. Talk about a shock to the Leo, lol. The rat part of me keeps my feet on the ground. The Leo part of me snobs the rat. They always bicker.

3. Leo likes loud music and parties, rat hates noise and fuss. Luckily Leo sits on rat when we go out, and we usually have a great time. Rat sulks.

4. The Leo in me insists that the house be clean at all times. The Leo also insists I get a maid. The rat in me just passed out. Thrift is the rat's middle name.

5. I clean my own house. The Leo in me wails 'At least wear gloves so you don't ruin your manicure!' The rat snears.

6. The Leo in me loves jewelry. The rat in me hocks it whenever we need rent money. I bought two pearl neckaces for 15$ each. The Leo in me was horrified. Only 15$? They must be fakes. I hocked them for 60$. The rat in me sang all the way home. Leo sulked.

7. One of my cashmere sweaters got a hole in it. "Throw it out!" cried Leo. "Wear it to gym," said the rat. I wear it to my gym class. Leo is secretly thrilled.

8. Leos and rats both like good food. They seem to agree that chocolate is next to Nirvana. At least they got Something right!

I tag:
Wyn, Doug, Kate R., John Nez, Bernita, December, Lyn Cash, & Seeley!

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

8th of May

Armistice Day. It's a national holiday here.


This morning it rained, but it's lovely and sunny out now. My daughter is playing with Auguste, who has a favorite toy. (An eviscerated soccer ball) He runs after it, grabs it, then tries to sneak it into the house. He's not very good at sneaking. One method is to run as fast as he can (with his short stumpy legs he doesn't go very fast!) and try to rush into his dog crate. But the door is too small for the soccer ball, and he always gets stuck, which gives us a chance to swoop in and grab it. (And throw it back outside.)


Here is Auguste running into the kitchen. You can see the hallway where my son leaves his running shoes, and where my daughter tossed her rollerblades and backpack. The blue bed is the dog's bed in the kitchen fireplace. Can you spot the picture of my husband and me on our wedding day?



My daughter throws the ball back into the garden - Auguste is ready to go get it!



Here's the photo of Stef and I on our wedding day!

Monday, May 07, 2007

President Sarko!

Well, we have a new president. He's a member of the last president's political group, so I'm surprised at all the articles starting with 'France Swings to the right!' It's true that the UMP is a conservative party inasmuch as it's opposed to the Socialist party, which comprises most of the 'left'. The UMP is a new party, created by Jacques Chirac, so most of his actions will remain in place. I can't see Sarkozy doing much to change things, but I can make a few predictions.
His first move will probably be lowering taxes, starting with those of 'big businesses' and helping the wealthy. This will spark resentment and make any other changes he has in mind more difficult. His next move will be to try and appease the youth of France - (over 75% of the 25 and younger voted for Segolin Royal because of her platform on new jobs.) He will probably make some sort of law about the working contracts, which give experience (but not jobs) to young job seekers. What he will need to do is abolish them completely, but I doubt he will. The universities will be watching him closely, as they have demanded more independence, and he has promised to give it to them.
He will try to break up the strong French unions. In that, he will fail. He will also try to install what he calls a 'minimum service' law, to insure service during strikes (he's already afraid of the strikes to come.) But unless he mobilizes the military, like they do in the US, he won't get far.
He will raise the cost of alcohol and cigarettes to pay for his tax cuts.
He will try to raise the price of diesal, will fail, and will raise the price of gas. He will say it's to help combat global warming, which is one of his rallying cries.
He will scuttle the 35 hour work week, and will probably make a wage freeze. My husband says he will not send troops to Iraq, but I can predict he'll send one of our warships over to the Gulf to 'help out'.
He's a very smart guy, and I can't stand him, but I'm willing to wait and see. France needs a financial makeover in order to open the market so that the young can get jobs. Unfortunately, Sarko will not help there. France's institutions are frozen by cronyism, and the rich help the rich, while the public sector is completely overblown and rusted shut. No one can get in or out.
We have a great educational system and wonderful healthcare, and I doubt that will change. But it might be harder for immigrants to get jobs, the young will get more and more dissatisfied, and there will be a few years of 'thin cow', as the French like to say.
But maybe a thin cow will be more lively and stronger than the fat cow we have right now.
So what are a few strikes?
Good Luck Sarko!

Sunday, May 06, 2007

The Glass Box Game!

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x1qbhu_embrevement-n3

Click on the link above. It will take you to a small video showing a big glass box perched on a pillar in Clichy, Paris.
I found this on Verilion's blog. (she lives in Paris! Quite a co-inkydinky, as my friend Patty likes to say!)

Anyhow, here is the game.

What would you do if you came upon the box?

(I would climb in it, and start shouting, "Beam me up, Scotty!!")

What would YOU do?

Saturday, May 05, 2007

Branding

I was over at Kate R's blog after reading her comment over here.
She has an interesting interview up with a best selling author.
The best selling author is telling Kate that her success is owed to LUCK and to BRANDING.
All sorts of images came to mind.
- A hefty cowgirl being singled out of the pack, tossed to the ground and branded with a red-hot iron. 'Romance Best Seller!' - Right on her plump rear.
- A woman wrapped in shiny cellophane, with heart-shaped pink labels advertising romance stuck in strategic places, a bright smile firmly pasted on pink lips. (not too much lipstick - we said romance, not erotica.)
- Betty Crocker. (All right, silly, I know, but whenever I think of branding I think of Betty Crocker. This time she's not holding a cookbook, she's holding a romance book, and she's wearing rhinestone festooned glasses.)

After the images came to mind, my mind (in typical Sam fashion) rebelled. I've always been a good girl striving desperately for a 'bad girl' image, lol. What? Branded? And you can't express any opinions? And you must be careful not to project any other image except that of your books??

(Already I'm starting to feel schizophrenic - I write erotica, mainstream, and YA fiction, science fiction, high fantasy, contemporary, urban fantasy, historical and paranormal...what on earth kind of brand would I get? I'm guessing it won't be pink and heart-shaped.)

I have strong opinions about things. I'm also open minded and can be swayed by a good argument. I love a good argument. But that's not the point of this blog. You can't really have a good argument on a blog - you can only post your opinions, get misunderstood, get into hot water, and decide it's better to stick with recipes by Betty Crocker.
But the best selling author did have a point when she insisted on having a good image. I just suppose that the last thing I want (sorry) is to be branded as a romance writer. It's too limited for me. For one thing, I do many things better than writing romance, and other things are more important to me.
I put so many things before my writing that it would really bother me to be branded. Think of me as one of those old steamer suitcases which has traveled all over the world, and has stickers in all sizes, shapes and colors from everywhere, in different languages, all over it. That's more like it.

As for the LUCK part - well, that's out of my hands, isn't it?
;-)

UPDATE:
Kate R. has told me that while I'm mentioning her blog, I better mention her Flipping Contest - so here it is: (click HERE) Now run along and enter her flipping contest!
It sounds pretty easy - just ask her for any of her books (except Taming Him, which I've already read Anyhow) and then post a review of it on your blog. (Good, bad, or whatever.) I like Kate's writing, so this is a contest I will actually Enjoy, lol.

Friday, May 04, 2007

A Proposal

It's a cloudy day - maybe I'll be able to get some writing done.
I have a confession. When it's sunny and the weather is lovely, I have to be outside. Or if not outside, doing something active. It's like I'm solar powered - the sun comes out and I move!
The house is spring-cleaned - all except for the kitchen. I've saved it for last, and will take it apart this weekend (when hubby is not around to see the mess, lol.) The garden is mowed, the flowers blooming, the birds singing...So I suppose I should be sitting down and finishing the two books I have to finish. And today it's cloudy, so I will try and work on them.

I sent another query out. I haven't heard back from anyone on any of my queries. I've sent out partials and fulls - but no news. Yesterday I sent a query directly to an editor who told me to go ahead and query her with a proposal, so I sent off 'In the Cards'. We'll see what happens!

What is a proposal?
It's what it sounds like. It's getting down on your knee, looking imporingly at the one you covet, and saying 'Here I am - do you want me?'
In the book world, it's usually comprised of a synopsis, a chapter by chapter outline, and the first three chapters (more or less) of the book. I sent off a 'blurb' synopsis (with hook) and a detailed synopsis with the beginning, middle, and end plotted out to show what would happen, when, and why. I sent the first five chapters, because they're short, and they end in a logical place.
Hopefully, the editor will like the proposal and tell me to go ahead and finish it. She'll either offer to buy it outright, or wait until it's finished. But at least it will give me the push I need to sit down and finish the story! It's all in my head. Now I have to sit and type!!!!

Thursday, May 03, 2007

More on BookMooch

So far I've had a good BookMooch experience. I sent six books and got five. Since I wasn't sure about postage, I refused to send to the US (expensive) but I did accept a book mooch from England, and later regretted it as it cost 6$ to send a book worth 7$. Live and learn! So I changed my profile to say I couldn't send outside France. Hopefully lots of French moochers will find my profile and mooch, so I can get some more books!
I just mooched 4 Terry Pratchett books - (I LOVE his Discworld series). I mooched a Colin Bateman, a Jennie Crusie, a Stephanie Bond, a Janet Evanovitch, (funny!) and a Dick Francis and an Ian Rankin (mystery books).
So Book Mooch has been a great experience so far.
Daisy mae just wrote and said she stumbled on a BookMooch scammer though. A guy listed bunches of books, mooched a bunch of books, then took his listing off and vanished. Bad Moocher, Bad!
I am going to clean up my bookcase in my bedroom, and my kids' bookcases, and will have a lot of new books to list. I'm sorry I don't ship to the US - it's just not worth it - might as well just buy the book from a used books bookstore. :-(
I saw a couple of my books floating around on BookMooch - that was fun. And Clean Reads had the drawing for Horse Passages - I'll have a drawing too when I get to the US this summer - I have a bunch of books to giveaway, so stay tuned for my July Giveaways!
OK - off to the gym!
Have a great day!

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

May Day!


Happy May 1st!


It's a holiday here, so hubby is working, lol. He got up early to head to the club where he has lessons, a practice game, and a dinner to go to. Last night we were out late - we had dinner in Paris. It was fun. We dropped off our daughter at her grandmother's aparment, along with a bag of take-out Chinese food for their dinner. Then we went to an Italian restaurant called 'Chez Livio', a nice Italian place that serves great food (I had a plate of lemony marinated green beans with mozzarella to start, and a small pizza with smoked ham and fresh rockette. (Pizza con parme y rucola) - and two coffees because I was falling asleep, I'm afraid. It was a business dinner with my husband and his polo team. Guess what they talked about all night long?

But it was nice to get out of the countryside. Paris at night is magical - I'm thinking of writing an urban fantasy with a Parisian setting - sort of like my zombie series. It could be a lot of fun to research too - I'd have to visit the catacombs and such. :-)


It's another gorgeous day. I ran out and picked a bouquet this morning - I grabbed the last Peonie, some iris, and a branch from our white lilac tree. I put it in the kitchen next to Seymou'r fishbowl. (There is Seymour, our Black Moor goldfish.) He's learned to come up to the surface when we show him the fish food box. I'd like to get him a bigger aquarium though. Behind it is one of my acrylic paintings I did at the race track. It's the parade ring, with the horses getting ready to go out on the track. And behind the bouquet, you can see part of my son's Chinese water color of bamboo, and in the front is the little clay horse my daughter made in school!



Today I have two English lessons, and I'm hoping to get some reading done for Calderwood Books. Our slush pile is building up again and we have two full manuscripts to evaluate as well as two full rewrites to look over. Our editor has six books on her plate right now, and we're slowly finding our limits as far as how much we can manage at once! Luckily, we love to read!

Monday, April 30, 2007

Rain!












We needed rain and last night we had a rainstorm. Thunder growled and lightning chased across the sky. We opened our window wide and lay on the bed, cool air billowing the curtains. The electricity went off once, and my husband had to go outside with a candle (our electric panel being in the side building!) He put his raincoat over his head and sheltered the candle from the driving rain. Otherwise he wore nothing but his slippers and boxer shorts - I should have taken a picture of that!
But this morning the sun is shining and the flowers look half drowned but happy.


You can click on the two last pictures and open them full size. That way they're big enough to use as wallpaper if you want!

Sunday, April 29, 2007

The difference between men and women, and a new haircut

My hubby is back from his trip in Spain - and I saw him for about an hour before he was dashing off again - two polo games, two referee jobs, polo lessons, and hopefully he'll be able to relax Monday!
I got my hair cut - and of course he didn't notice; men do not notice this sort of thing.
There are other differences I've noted between men and women.
I'm reading a mystery thriller, and the hero is investigating his brother's death. He goes to ask some questions of a seedy character, and the seedy character gets scared, closes shop, jumps in his car, and goes to see his boss - thus leading hero straight to the big bad guy.
Now, if the seedy character had been a woman, this would not have worked and the hero would still be searching for the killer.
Why?
Does anyone know why?
I'll tell you.
Because a woman would pick up her phone and Call the boss. She would not close the shop, get in her car, and drive for a half an hour when she can pick up her phone and spend thirty seconds telling about the problem.
This is the truth.
How many times has my husband been halfway out the door, car keys in hand, to see someone or find out something, when he could just call? I usually point to the phone, and the yellow pages, because I've also noticed that he'd rather spend half an hour driving than spend seventeen seconds looking up a number in the phone book.
*sigh*
So, men don't notice hair cuts and they don't have the telephone reflex.
There are a few other differences.
My husband can ask me what time it is five times in fifteen minutes, and never listen to the answer. I've started saying things like 'It's half past seventy', and he'll grunt, and then a few mintutes later, ask what time it is. Men will ask a question, and not hear the answer. Why? I've yet to figure this one out.
I'm listening to Mika - his album is so bright and fun - I love it.
If you pop over to my MySpace page, you can hear one of his songs - or go to his page and listen to a couple!

Oh, and I redesigned the Calderwood Books page - please let me know what you think!
Thanks!

Thursday, April 26, 2007

A really interesting post about cleaning the floor...

This past week has been busy. School started again, and I started spring cleaning, which for me, means taking the house apart room by room and cleaning from top to bottom. My husband, the neat freak, loves the result, but the part about taking everything apart drives him batty, so I decided to clean while he was in Spain. My son is in college during the day, and most evenings he's in Versailles at the spring firemen's training session, so my only help are the two dogs, who get under my feet more than anything else. Auguste is curious about everything. He loves to watch me sweep - I think the broom hypnotizes him, and he's always tramping through the dust piles and sneezing, or sticking his nose in my bucket of brushes and sponges. I usually end up looking for a sponge or two in his bed.
Right now, I'm waiting for the stuff to work that I put on the floor to strip the old wax off. If you figure that this house is about 120 years old, and that no one has ever stripped the wax off the tiles, you can imagine the layer of wax; Well, it's not so bad, actually. The house is small, and people and dogs walk on almost every area, wearing down the wax. So it's just in the corners and along the walls. (See, I told you this was a really interesting post on cleaning floors...)
I was going to go to the gym this morning, but I figure I'll get enough exercise scrubbing wax.
News on trading:
The braces trading is working really well. What I worked out was giving lessons in exchange for part of the braces payment, and the dentist, who is a very nice woman, decided to give my daughter the clear braces at no extra cost. I was VERY touched, and now I have to think of a present to give her in order to say thank you. (My whole collection of Ellora's Cave books?) (My friend Lynn suggested that, lol.)

And I know, I know...I didn't say a word about the French elections. In this house, almost everyone has a different opinion about politics, so discussions are lively. My son voted one way, my husband another, and I was hoping for yet another candidate. The run-offs are the 6th of May, and in our house, at least, the votes will negate each other, unless someone persuades someone else, lol. I doubt that will happen. Hubby is a stubborn Taurus, and son was born in the Chinese year of the equally stubborn ox. In France, the record for voters' turn-out was bested. I think they said that almost 80% of the electorate turned out to vote, and they voted against the extremists of both sides by choosing the moderate middle. Sarkozy is our conservative and Segolin is our liberal candidate. Both have their plusses and minuses, so it's really a toss-up who could do the better job. But I will predict one thing. If Sarkozy wins, and tries to push his reforms through, there will be more strikes in France than in Italy in its worst years. The French hate change of any kind, no matter what they say, lol.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Win a free copy of Horse Passages!

Go here: Clean Reads, leave a message, and you will be entered in a drawing for a copy of Horse Passages!
Good Luck!

Monday, April 23, 2007

International Pixel-stained Technopeasant Day

According to Mr. Hendrix, vice president at SFWA, authors should never post work for free or undersell their work, because that undercuts other authors who are trying to make a living writing fiction...
As if anyone can make a living writing fiction.
Let me pick myself off the floor and wipe the coffee off my keyboard. Sorry. SOME people can make a decent living (fiction) writing. In France, where I live, the percentage is 5% of writers (published fiction authors) actually make a living from their writing. It is probably a little higher in the US.
I do not make a living writing fiction. I make pocket money. I make enough money to send my son in the US to community college, and to buy transport tickets for my college son here in France. I make enough to buy myself plane tickets to visit my family in the states. I make enough to indulge myself once a year, and buy myself something I've been drooling over (like a digital camera). I consider myself one of those thousands of 'midlist' authors, waiting for a big break, maybe forever, but content to move along and hone my craft and write and sell my stories. And give them away for free. I post short flash fiction here quite a bit. There are some in my archives.
At any rate, in honor of Mr. Hendrix's comments, Jo Walton has declared today International Pixel-stained Technopeasant Day, and has proposed that authors and aspiring authors post professional quality work online. (Here is her post).
I'm sure that authors who make their living writing are not worried about the struggling masses posting their work online. And so, without further ado, I will post the story I wrote that was nominated for the Pushcart Prize, and first published in the Vestal Review (Thank you Mark Budman, for believing in me.)

Honey On Your Skin

by Jennifer Macaire

Leave honey on your skin. Wash it off with water, and pat rose petals on your cheeks.
Tie the leather laces tightly. Wear your armor over a linen shirt.
Brush your hair nightly. Sew lavender in your pillowcase.
Sharpen your lance. Make sure that your quiver is full.
Soak your hands in lemon juice to whiten your nails. Darken your eyes with kohl.
Harden your hands with live coals. Run for a day, in case your horse falls beneath you.
You are a desert flower, a fragile blossom.
You are a mighty warrior, a fearless brave.
Goodnight, my sweet daughter.
Godspeed, my son.
The young girl lay down on silk pillows and watched muslin curtains billow in the night breeze. Her hands had curly arabesques painted in henna. Moths blundered softly about the room.
The young warrior rode across the desert. By his side were five hundred soldiers. The sound of the horses' hooves was summer thunder. Five hundred spears glinted in the moonlight like lightning.
The young girl heard shouting. She ran to the window. In the garden, men ran across the lawn, their boots trampling curry sage and rosemary.
The young warrior left his horse at the gate. With his men, he fought his way through the archway and over a wall. They ran through the garden, and threw their ropes and hooks onto the roof.
The girl watched as men swarmed up the walls. As one reached her window, he looked in. Their eyes met.
The young warrior saw the girl. At that moment, an arrow pierced his armor. He swung wildly, then started to fall.
The girl pulled him inside. She half-carried him to her bed. She untied his laces and undid his armor. The arrow protruded from his side, its feathered end trembling with each breath.
The warrior clenched his teeth. Was he lying in a silken bed, or was he dead? The pain in his side seemed to argue for life. Paradise, he reasoned, should be painless.
The girl studied the boy‘s face. He was the enemy, but no one had told her that the enemy had such finely arched brows. She would have to remove the arrow and cauterize the wound. The brazier held red coals. She eased the arrow from his side. Then she seized a coal with tongs and held it to the cut.
The smell of burning flesh woke the warrior from his dream. He opened his eyes, and found himself staring at a young woman. His side ached, but the arrow was gone.
"My horse is at the gate. Help me, and you shall be my bride."
"Spare my family, and I will bring my jewels as dowry."
They were married. When their children were born, they spoke thus: Leave honey on your skin. Sew lavender in your pillow, and learn the art of healing. Sharpen your lance, and make sure your horse will carry two people.

Copyright © 2000 Jennifer Macaire

PS - and for more free fiction on the web, check out Rhian's poetry train HERE.

Small budget stuff: Book Mooch & Freecycling

I found a place called Book Mooch! (www.bookmooch.com) You list the books you want to give away, and you mooch the books you want from other book moochers! Each book you donate goves you points, each book you mooch takes away points. You can donate points to public libraries for charity, you can find out of print books, you can get tons of books for free! (Well, for the price of shipping and handling when you send your Own books.)
Since I live in France, and postage is SO expensive, I can't offer to ship to anywhere outside Europe, so I've limited myself to mooching from people in Europe. So far I've mooched:
10 lb Penalty by Dick Francis
Turbulent Priests by Colin Bateman
The Chimney Sweeper's Boy by Barbara Vine
and a children's book for my daughter.
I've sent off five books to France so far, and that cost 5 euros, so I'll get 4 books for 5 euros, which is a nice bargain for someone with a tight budget!

I also joined the local Freecycling club here in Paris, and that's cool too.
In this club, people recycle objects rather than throw them away by offering them for free.
It's a club for all who want to "recycle" that special something rather than throw it away. Whether it's a chair, piano or an old door, (or ice cube trays or plant holders - I'm looking at the website, lol.) you just post your offer and whovever is interested contacts you and comes to get your 'trash'.

To help balance my budget, I've been doing a lot of trading. I've traded paintings for veterinary fees, English lessons for part of the cost of braces, English tutoring in exchange for ironing, and I've babysat in exchange for jeans even. Trade is a good way to work things into a small budget. For example, I've been helping a neighbor by taking her kids to the sport club every Wednesday, and in exchange she gives me fresh eggs and garden veggies. I know that the chiropractor here in the village often gets part of his payment in vegetables and eggs - his wife told me that when I spied a huge crate of apples in her trunk! Clothes get passed back and forth in the village as well. My daughter wears hand-me-downs from my friends, and when she grows out of them, I pass them on. A lot of the kids in the village have worn the same clothes, especially winter coats and pants - it seems kids grow out of those before they can get worn out.

And let's not forget Ye Olde Thifte Shoppe! Today I'm wearing a blouse and a sweater I got at the thrift. The sweater is an old, wrap-around style in pure cashmere. Someone gave it away, and I bought it for a dollar.
So, for all you budget-minded folk out there, you can get free books at Book Mooch, find free stuff at FreeCycle (both are world wide), trade, and get cheap clothes at the thrift!

Saturday, April 21, 2007

Contest, pre-editing, golf, sun-burn, dog's tail tale

Jason Evans over at a newly discovered blog The Clarity of Night (new for me - you've probably known it for ages) is hosting a contest with a photo - you have to write something about it. So I did. When could I ever resist a contest? I'm entry number 8, and here is the link to the blog (not my entry) There are lots of other really great entries there. One is about a were-wolf-wife, another is about a college dorm - all are great. Go read and have fun!

* * *
It's been a busy few days. After stopping my allergy medicine I'm actually getting some work done. I can sit at the computer and work without falling asleep or into a transe. I've been pre-editing some wonderful books.
Pre-editing, you ask? I'm not an editor. Someone called me 'agent Sam' on another blog - but I'm not an agent. I do write and I read a lot. I've been reading the submissions and sending them on to our editor if I like them. One submission needed a little trimming in the beginning to make it move faster. The story moves like a freight train once it gets going, but it was bogging down in the beginning. That is, by the way, not hard to fix at all. Cut, snip, trim! Take out everything that is not essential to the story and that does not advance the story. It's an easy thing to remember, but it's hard to do when you've written a novel that's 250 pages long and you're so involved in the story that you can't sort out what's essential information for the reader and what's not. The information is there, in your head, and it's part of the character or house. Fine. It can help the writer to know as much about his or her character as possible. But some things are not essential for the reader to know.
Here is some good advice:
Let the Reader Use His Imagination!
This is also where a good beta reader comes in handy. "Take this out, I don't need to know this. Explain what that means. You don't have to keep saying that, you said it already before. Trust me, readers remember things."
I cut and trim (nothing is done without the author's consent!), and send the book to the editor for the final polish.


Golf: Played golf again. My elbow (the one I broke) is not happy with golf. It makes strange noises, cracks, hurts, and complains. So I'm complaining too. But there's no way I'm giving up my golf.


Sun-burn: It's still summer weather here. We are covered with sun block. My nose is pink already.


A dog's tail tale: Auguste sprained his tail. It looks funny, but hurts (the poor chap), and will get better in about five or six days. Until then he has doggy aspirin and lots of hugs. He's milking it for all it's worth - sitting at my feet and moaning every once in a while, so I'll hug him.

Friday, April 20, 2007

Braces!

My daughter got her braces today.

She's quite happy with them (so far) but tomorrow the dentist said she'd probably be sore.

I wrote the appointment down for the wrong day - but thankfully I wrote it down

as yesterday, so we showed up yesterday and were told it was today. Far better than showing up tomorrow and having to reschedule another appointment!

I also hit some golf balls today, and started giving my daughter golf lessons. And for the million-th time I thought how privileged I am, and how lucky I am to be able to get braces for my daughter and be able to play golf.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Adding some color

At breakfast today I was sketching Sebi (who does not like it when I draw him or take his picture, but he sat still enough for me to finish) with his apple and cereal, Julia with her bread, and when they left, the table with the leftover baguette, the honey, the napkin holder, and my lucky coffee cup.
Doesn't everyone have a lucky coffee cup?











A scary movie

My daughter wanted to go to the movies, and she'd loved Narnia, so we went to see The Bridge to Terabithia. Let me just say that it was one of the worst films I've ever seen. The story meanders, characters appear and disappear. Nothing is resolved. And the ending absolutely terrified me. What was that kid going to do with his little sister? I had the distinct impression she would end up cut into little pieces...
Let me go back a little here, for those who have never seen the movie. And if you haven't, don't bother, and whatever you do, don't take your kids, especially, as my daughter said, if your kid is bullied at school, is troubled, or has no friends. Because for what it's worth, the moral of the story is: When your best friend dies, everyone is nice to you and your life suddenly has a meaning.
My daughter is 12, and here is her verdict: "That movie was the stupidest movie I've ever seen. What happened to the girl's mother? How could she have hit her head, there were thick weeds and water everywhere? Why did the boy make his music teacher feel so guilty? It wasn't her fault. How come the big mean girl is suddenly so nice? That's just stupid."
Well, she's twelve and I'm translating from French here, but you get my gist. And the kids leaving the movie theater looked, for the most part, disappointed and confused.
"I kept waiting for the fantasy world to become real," said my daughter. "But it only became real in the end in the boy's head, and that's scary."
Yup. Scary. The boy retreats into a fantasy world, and he brings his baby sister with him, after swearing her to utter secrecy. "Do not tell Anyone about this," he tells her, and brings her into the woods.
Any child psychologist would be leaping up in his seat yelling, "No! Bring her back!"
Anyhow, the whole movie creeped me out.
My daughter's parting thoughts were, "there was no valid reason to kill that nice girl. No reason at all. It was just plain stupid."
I get pissed when authors use the shock of killing someone in order to spice up their otherwise colorless and boring books. This was no different, and yet, there was a story to be told. The story of a lonely boy in a financially troubled family. If he'd solved his problems in the real world instead of retreating into an imaginary world, the story would have worked. But no problem was resolved by the boy, and in the end he was in a world of his own imagination where, I imagine, live the same lonely boys who find guns and destroy their enemies by violence, which is the only thing that seems to work.
When your best friend dies, everyone is nice to you.
Scary.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

sketches

My husband is writing a book on polo technique, and he asked me to do some drawings to illustrate the different types of swings, starting with the basic forehand shot. So I asked him to grab a polo stick and show me the different positions he needed illustrated. I did some preliminary sketches, and then he left for Spain, so I have to wait until he gets back to finalize them. In the meantime, I put them together on a black board and tried to figure out the best way to present them. And when I was done, I did a few other sketches, finishing off with Rusty and Auguste, who were obviously bored by my work.


The basic polo swing

After the game





Discussions with the referee





Stick and balling with the old white mare




Rusty crosses her paws when she sleeps August sleeps on his back.










Tuesday, April 17, 2007

2 things at once...


I used to be able to do two things at once. At least, I'm pretty sure. But lately I have been getting into trouble with my penchant for juggling tasks. My latest endeavor was mowing the lawn while baking a cake. I admit the oven was too hot, but I should have caught it beforehand. My goose-egg cake is burned. I have tried to salvage it, but I don't know if it will be any good.

The other things I burned the other day were the sausages I put on the grill, then ran inside to make the salad. But the sausages burned. Luckily I had some wild boar steaks that I'd been planning on serving the next evening. I tossed those on the grill and watched them carefully.

This morning I took my husband to the airport and was stuck in traffic for an hour on the way home, so I'm feeling tired. I still have to take my daughter to the dentist and I'd really like to finish the book I'm editing. (I will not edit while driving, never fear!)

Hubby has just called - he's safely arrived in Spain where he's staying for two weeks. Lucky guy! I love Spain. But the weather here is resolutely summer still, so I'll not complain.

Instead, I will fix myself another cup of coffee and go keep an eye on my goose egg cake!


PS:
I just tasted the cake. It is unedible.
*sniff*
My son looked at it, said 'Uck', and went out for a jog.
Auguste seems to like it.
He's a weird dog.

Monday, April 16, 2007

Seriously Summer


Today I clipped our front hedge and finished mowing the lawn. I started on Saturday, but on Sunday it's illegal to mow grass (because of the noise) so I took the day off and went for a walk instead. I also got some work done yesterday, including putting the newsletter for the Sirens together and getting a tiny bit of editing and reading done. If anyone who submitted to Calderwood Books has not gotten an answer back, they should submit again, because we are all caught up with submissions and asking for partials. (I'm posting this here just in case.) So yesterday was a 'get caught up' day.

Today it's so hot we left our back door wide open for a breeze, and the dogs are inside lying on the tiled floor. Bees bumble in the garden, but not as many as I'd like to see. Our cherry tree is usually covered with blossoms and buzzing with bees; this year we have snowy blossoms, but it's too early for the bees. The ones who have woken up are clumsy and sleepy and crawl into our rooms through the open windows and get lost. We have no screens in the windows--there are few mosquitos and even fewer bees and wasps. Thanks to the farms we have flies, but they are clever and don't get caught in curtains.

Yesterday I set three bees loose after they blundered into my house and got stuck in the filmy, white curtains. Silly bees. But I'm still worried. The cherry blossoms need bees to make lots of cherries, and this year the flowers all came a month early. My apple trees a'blossoming, and it too is lonely for bees. The cherry tree is already shedding its petals like fragile snowflakes.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Car show in the village

Here's my house, and two cars parked in front of it which are part of the car show this morning. This afternoon we're getting jaguars and antique cars, so I'm keeping my camera ready! Thank goodness the scaffolding from the roof came down yesterday (it's all lying in the garden but you can't see it anymore, so the village looks chic.)



August has made his choice, sitting and looking at a bright red Ferrari. He's a boy dog, so I guess he likes cars.



Here's the church with some more cars parked in front of it. Everyone is in the restaurant eating lunch. August saw our neighbor's cat and ran away, and I had to run after him, yelling "Auguste, leave that cat alone!" He doubled back and ran as fast as he could back to the house with me pounding after him to make sure he didn't go the Other way around the block. It was entertainment for the people in the restaurant, I'm sure.

Here's August in front of the restaurant, admiring another car.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

So it goes...

Kurt Vonnegut was, no is, my favorite author. My favorite book of his is 'Welcome to the Monkey House', because it is such a clear reflection of humankind. It's a collection of short stories and I've read my copy until the pages are frayed and soft on the corners.

My second favorite book of his is 'Saughterhouse V', and if you've never read it, I feel sorry for you, like you've never had a hot fudge sundae or seen a beautiful sunset over a lake. So go to your local library (please) and get a copy of Slaughterhouse V. As you read it, remember that he was in the war, he was a young kid fighting in WWII, and he was captured and brought to Dresden. He survived the horrific fire bombing. He was one of seventeen soldiers to survive because he was in the basement of a meat factory. So when you read this book, think about a nineteen year old kid who has just witnessed the destruction of a whole city, and then his captives order him to incinerate the bodies with a flame thrower. And somehow, some way - he kept his sense of humor, and Saughterhouse V is a funny book. A funny, whacky, sad story. It's also one of the best and truest examples of war and what it does to people.

Here is an excerpt from his last book, "A Man Without a Country". He wrote this in 2005, when he'd already said everything he'd wanted to say. He didn't think he'd be writing another book but he did, and it was a best seller. Here's what he said about it. "It's like a glass of champagne at the end of my life."
He also said "So it goes." Kurt Vonnegut is dead. So it goes.



"Do unto others what you would have them do unto you." A lot of people think Jesus said that, because it is so much the sort of thing Jesus liked to say. But it was actually said by Confucius, a Chinese philosopher, five hundred years before there was that greatest and most humane of human beings, named Jesus Christ.
The Chinese also gave us, via Marco Polo, pasta and the formula for gunpowder. The Chinese were so dumb they only used gunpowder for fireworks. And everybody was so dumb back then that nobody in either hemisphere even knew that there was another one.

We've sure come a long way since then. Sometimes I wish we hadn't. I hate H-bombs and the Jerry Springer Show
But back to people like Confucius and Jesus and my son the doctor, Mark, each of whom have said in their own way how we could behave more humanely and maybe make the world a less painful place. One of my favourite humans is Eugene Debs, from Terre Haute in my native state of Indiana.
Get a load of this. Eugene Debs, who died back in 1926, when I was not yet four, ran five times as the Socialist party candidate for president, winning 900,000 votes, almost 6 percent of the popular vote, in 1912, if you can imagine such a ballot. He had this to say while campaigning:
"As long as there is a lower class, I am in it.
"As long as there is a criminal element, I am of it.
"As long as there is a soul in prison, I am not free."
Doesn't anything socialistic make you want to throw up? Like great public schools, or health insurance for all?
When you get out of bed each morning, with the roosters crowing, wouldn't you like to say. "As long as there is a lower class, I am in it. As long as there is a criminal element, I am of it. As long as there is a soul in prison, I am not free."
How about Jesus' Sermon on the Mount, the Beatitudes?
Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the Earth.
Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God.
And so on.
Not exactly planks in a Republican platform. Not exactly George W Bush, Dick Cheney, or Donald Rumsfeld stuff.
For some reason, the most vocal Christians among us never mention the Beatitudes. But, often with tears in their eyes, they demand that the Ten Commandments be posted in public buildings. And of course that's Moses, not Jesus. I haven't heard one of them demand that the Sermon on the Mount, the Beatitudes, be posted anywhere.
"Blessed are the merciful" in a courtroom? "Blessed are the peacemakers" in the Pentagon? Give me a break!
It so happens that idealism enough for anyone is not made of perfumed pink clouds. It is the law! It is the US Constitution.
But I myself feel that our country, for whose Constitution I fought in a just war, might as well have been invaded by Martians and body snatchers. Sometimes I wish it had been. What has happened instead is that it was taken over by means of the sleaziest, low-comedy, Keystone Cops-style coup d'état imaginable.
I was once asked if I had any ideas for a really scary reality TV show. I have one reality show that would really make your hair stand on end: "C-Students from Yale".
George W Bush has gathered around him upper-crust C-students who know no history or geography, plus not-so-closeted white supremacists, aka Christians, and plus, most frighteningly, psychopathic personalities, or PPs, the medical term for smart, personable people who have no consciences.
To say somebody is a PP is to make a perfectly respectable diagnosis, like saying he or she has appendicitis or athlete's foot. The classic medical text on PPs is The Mask of Sanity by Dr Hervey Cleckley, a clinical professor of psychiatry at the Medical College of Georgia, published in 1941. Read it!
Some people are born deaf, some are born blind or whatever, and this book is about congenitally defective human beings of a sort that is making this whole country and many other parts of the planet go completely haywire nowadays. These were people born without consciences, and suddenly they are taking charge of everything.
PPs are presentable, they know full well the suffering their actions may cause others, but they do not care. They cannot care because they are nuts. They have a screw loose!
And what syndrome better describes so many executives at Enron and WorldCom and on and on, who have enriched themselves while ruining their employees and investors and country and who still feel as pure as the driven snow, no matter what anybody may say to or about them? And they are waging a war that is making billionaires out of millionaires, and trillionaires out of billionaires, and they own television, and they bankroll George Bush, and not because he's against gay marriage.
So many of these heartless PPs now hold big jobs in our federal government, as though they were leaders instead of sick. They have taken charge. They have taken charge of communications and the schools, so we might as well be Poland under occupation.
They might have felt that taking our country into an endless war was simply something decisive to do. What has allowed so many PPs to rise so high in corporations, and now in government, is that they are so decisive. They are going to do something every fuckin' day and they are not afraid. Unlike normal people, they are never filled with doubts, for the simple reason that they don't give a fuck what happens next. Simply can't. Do this! Do that! Mobilise the reserves! Privatise the public schools! Attack Iraq! Cut health care! Tap everybody's telephone! Cut taxes on the rich! Build a trillion-dollar missile shield! Fuck habeas corpus and the Sierra Club and In These Times, and kiss my ass!
There is a tragic flaw in our precious Constitution, and I don't know what can be done to fix it. This is it: only nut cases want to be president. This was true even in high school. Only clearly disturbed people ran for class president.
The title of Michael Moore's Fahrenheit 9/11 is a parody of the title of Ray Bradbury's great science-fiction novel Fahrenheit 451. Four hundred and fifty-one degrees Fahrenheit is the combustion point, incidentally, of paper, of which books are composed. The hero of Bradbury's novel is a municipal worker whose job is burning books.
While on the subject of burning books, I want to congratulate librarians, not famous for their physical strength, who, all over this country, have staunchly resisted anti-democratic bullies who have tried to remove certain books from their shelves, and destroyed records rather than have to reveal to thought police the names of persons who have checked out those titles.
So the America I loved still exists, if not in the White House, the Supreme Court, the Senate, the House of Representatives, or the media. The America I loved still exists at the front desks of our public libraries.
And still on the subject of books: our daily news sources, newspapers and TV, are now so craven, so unvigilant on behalf of the American people, so uninformative, that only in books do we learn what's really going on.
I will cite an example: House of Bush, House of Saud by Craig Unger, published in early 2004, that humiliating, shameful, blood-soaked year.
In case you haven't noticed, as the result of a shamelessly rigged election in Florida, in which thousands of African-Americans were arbitrarily disenfranchised, we now present ourselves to the rest of the world as proud, grinning, jut-jawed, pitiless war-lovers with appallingly powerful weaponry - who stand unopposed.
In case you haven't noticed, we are now as feared and hated all over the world as Nazis once were.
And with good reason.
In case you haven't noticed, our unelected leaders have dehumanised millions and millions of human beings simply because of their religion and race. We wound 'em and kill 'em and torture 'em and imprison 'em all we want.
Piece of cake.
In case you haven't noticed, we also dehumanised our own soldiers, not because of their religion or race, but because of their low social class.
Send 'em anywhere. Make 'em do anything.
Piece of cake.
The O'Reilly Factor.
So I am a man without a country, except for the librarians and a Chicago paper called In These Times.
Before we attacked Iraq, the majestic New York Times guaranteed there were weapons of mass destruction there.
Albert Einstein and Mark Twain gave up on the human race at the end of their lives, even though Twain hadn't even seen the first world war. War is now a form of TV entertainment, and what made the first world war so particularly entertaining were two American inventions, barbed wire and the machine gun.
Shrapnel was invented by an Englishman of the same name. Don't you wish you could have something named after you?
Like my distinct betters Einstein and Twain, I now give up on people, too. I am a veteran of the second world war and I have to say this is not the first time I have surrendered to a pitiless war machine.
My last words? "Life is no way to treat an animal, not even a mouse."
Napalm came from Harvard. Veritas
Our president is a Christian? So was Adolf Hitler. What can be said to our young people, now that psychopathic personalities, which is to say persons without consciences, without senses of pity or shame, have taken all the money in the treasuries of our government and corporations, and made it all their own?


© 2005 Kurt Vonnegut Extracted from A Man Without a Country: A Memoir of Life in George W Bush's America,

Premature babies

Alex and Sebi - just out of the hospital. Two months old. They weigh 4 lbs each. You can see where their hair was shaved off for the intravenous needles. Alex (on the left) is slightly bigger than Sebi.


My son is taking psychology and he's in the middle of doing a report on the effects of prematurity on a person's life. I told him to use his own experience, but he went to the library and got lots of books, so I've been stealing them off his desk and reading them.
The twins were born at exactly 6 months gestation - around 24 or 25 weeks.
According to the books on premature babies, they were in the group called 'prematurissimos' - the most premature and the most fragile. The problems faced by the premature baby are numerous. They are taken from their mother, kept in isolation, given painful treatments, and they feel attacked. They don't feel secure, and they are particularly given to depression and nervous tics as they grow older. According to the book, they have missed a crucial stage in their developement, and they need extra care and attention when they finally do get 'home'.
The book says that the prematurissimos catch up to their age group at arond the age of ten. That's ten years spent lagging behind, often in size, health, and maturity.
The twins were very premature, and one was very ill in the hospital, and fragile after. One was very strong and never got sick. One has asthma, the other does not. One is good in math (the book says that often premature babies have problems later with math.) one is good in art. Both are so different that it's hard to read the book and 'find' the twins.
At the end of the book, it stresses the importance of environment and stimulation. Premature babies need a lot more care than 'normal' babies. Massages, the 'kangaroo' method, and constant interaction are important.
In the book, one child says, "I was premature, but I survived. That makes me stronger now."
The book points to this as an important factor - children who overcome severe difficulties don't feel bad about their lives - on the contrary, most of them are proud to have survived and feel special.
The twins were born weighing 3 lbs and 2.8 lbs. They spent 8 weeks in the intensive care unit in the Good Samaritan hospital in West Palm Beach. They had the best doctors and nurses, and they made good progress. They came home weighing 4 lbs each. We spent one month in Florida with them, then flew to France (they were five pounds by then) and then went to England in May for the polo season, where we stayed in a tiny but comfortable house in the Cotswalds.
I do remember the doctors giving us lots of advice about the preemies, as they're called. They told us they would probably not smile as soon, they would not be affectionate, they would be difficult and prone to crying and tantrums. They didn't tell me they would be get the famous 3 month colic, which is what the poor babies got, and had for nearly 6 weeks when they were (adjusted age) three months old. Both babies screaming in pain for hours every evening wore us down to dust, I'm afraid. Luckily I have a big family, and everyone pitched in to help.
What I learned about preemies is, don't be afraid to ask for help!
And massage therapy is good, the babies loved that, and carrying them around in the kangaroo carriers was nice for them. Since they had a bottle every 3 hours around the clock, and finally by the time they were 7 months old, it had become every 5 hours, they got a lot of interaction and stimulation. We would take turns getting up for the 5 am bottle, and take turns going to bed at 11 and skipping the midnight bottle, so someone always got at least 7 hours sleep every night. (Usually my husband because he was playing polo, and you can't play when you're falling asleep on the horse...) So my sister, Sophie, or Andrea, me (or whoever else was around) would get up at 4:30 to get the bottles ready and then two of us would feed the babies at 5 am, and we'd put them in their kangaroos, and we'd go for long walks in the English countryside.

Here is Alex's footprint from the hospital. I put it next to a ruler (centimetres) and my business card, so you can get an idea of how big it was.
The first seven months were tough, and then we went to Bordeaux and the babies started sleeping more or less through the night. (They were 9 months old by then, and had been breast fed, then weaned from soy milk to normal baby formula.) We stayed in France for five months, then it was back to the states for Christmas, where Sebi discovered the baby bouncer and spent hours bouncing up and down and laughing. We travelled from the US to Argentina, to France and then England every year with the twins until they were 6, and had to go to school. We settled in Lyons, in France, and I stayed with the twins while my husband travelled. It wasn't easy, but I wanted the twins to do well in school, and since premature babies often have learning difficulties, we decided we wanted them to be in a good school system. They didn't have any problems, and by the time they were in second grade, had managed to become completely bi-lingual. (Before we'd only spoken to them in English - they didn't really learn French until they were about 6.)
They had physical scars from being premature. They still have scarred heels and Alex has a scar on his nose. But they seem to have overcome their difficult beginning and survived, gotten strong, and become healthy and hopefully happy young men!
I know when I saw them for the first time in the hospital, I never believed they could grow - but they did.